Why Online Dating Helps Set Healthy Boundaries

I’m a busy guy.  I own two businesses and they keep me running six days a week.  The seventh?  I am resting, recovering, and preparing for the next wave of excitement that being a self-employed personal trainer brings.

That being said, I meet the women I date almost exclusively online or on apps.  It certainly doesn’t exclude the chances I have to meet someone in person around Denver.  However, I haven’t yet mixed business with pleasure and I don’t intend to start anytime soon!

Just the other day, Rachel Friend and I were discussing how meeting online dating brings a new perspective to the “scene”.  That gave us the crazy idea to host a Facebook and Instagram live experience for you that you won’t want to miss!

Topics we wanted to cover included setting healthy boundaries, intentions, and strategies to show up as your most authentic self, online, in-person, and around town!

In this article I wanted to share what I’ve learned from online dating that helps me set healthy boundaries for myself and others!

    1. The time of day that I start up a conversation with someone I am interested is very important to setting healthy boundaries.  In episode 13 of the BBR podcast, Jessica Smith interviewed me to gain my perspective on modern dating.  I don’t work normal business hours as a personal trainer in Denver.  Therefore, I need to be aware of when the best time to contact others.  First of all, my phone is set to “do not disturb” from 9pm to 9am so if someone messages me after that time I know my exactly what my boundary is at that time!
    2. First impressions mean so much in modern dating!  Especially when online dating is where you are meeting people.  Selecting photographs that both accurately display your personality and uniqueness is challenging but some ideas to steer clear of are…
      1. Please choose a few details about yourself that you love in your bio!  Even a few words go a long way to attract the type of person you are looking for.  If you don’t have a bio filled out and you make a match with someone, you are more likely to encounter someone that only swiped because of superficial reasons.  If you’re looking for someone authentic like me, you would be setting yourself to waste your time.
      2. Don’t have a photo of you flipping off the camera
      3. Don’t have every single photograph with friends or family because you only have two seconds to make that first impression and if we are stopping to figure out which one you are… it’s a swipe left more often that not!
      4. Your first two pictures should be one of your face and one of your whole body, head to toe.  The rest can bring out your uniqueness and personality in any way you wish!

Why is this so important, you may ask?

Because setting healthy boundaries means saving everyone a whole lot of time.  Especially your time!

You don’t want to be going out on a lot of first dates, wondering why you aren’t getting asked out twice, only to find out it’s because you misrepresented yourself online before meeting in person!

Trust me, there is someone out there for everyone if you’re patient enough and willing to put in the work and the time it takes to develop personally and gain confidence through self-love and appreciation!

If you love the BBR Podcast and would like to show your support, please click here to donate today!

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